Tuesday, October 16, 2007

Courtship in the Time of SMS: A Piso Investment

Courtship through the decades:

70s: Visiting Victor regularly visits the girls house with varying gifts of flowers, fruits and delicacies (live chickens included).
80s: Telebabad Tom calls the girl's house every night for a 2 to 3-hour chit-chat. Occassional butting ins from party line may ruin Telebabad Tim's timing for asking the girl out.
90s: Pager PJ covers his mouth as he dictates the word "I love you" to a pager operator while a queue waiting for the pay phone is behind him

And now, we have Texting Tim. You catch his fancy one gimmick night at let's say, Warehouse. He asks for your number and the next day, he'll send you a message to let you know that well, he is interested. His thoughtfulness is manifested by his piso-a-day investments, checking on you by sending you messages like "gawa mo?", "sup?" or "musta?".

Sometimes Texting Tim's thoughtfulness may become an invitation for a casual get-together by sending you "gmk?". If you're out, it's likely that Tim's going to drop by and officially meet your girl friends. A more formal Texting Tim may ask you out by sending you a message like "wanna watch a movie on Friday?" or "r u free 4 coffee tonight?" But the worse that Texting Tim can ever text you is "stl up?" because most of the time, if Texting Tim is not looking for a late night confidante, he is looking for a late night booty call.

We have seen how courtship has changed over the decades. Our lolas and moms were courted differently which explains why they demand more from our guys. Most of the time, they even expect to be courted as well. Of course, we cannot blame them for thinking that way. They were raised by a different set of norms and moreover, they consumed adolescence in the absence of SMS, IM, e-mails and iMax cinemas. (The latter explains why it's a crime for them when they find out that we have went to the movies alone with a boyfriend.)

Hi-tech courtship is convenient. For one, it is so easy to be connected. One can easily check how someone is doing just by texting. Dates can be easily re-set and cancelled with just one short message. Avoiding someone takes very little effort through hitting the silent or reject button everytime the persistent manliligaw calls.

While it is good that torpes will finally find it easier to make a move, the real issue on courtship in time of text is, are we willing to sell ourselves cheap?

Most of us--even the fairest of us all, have met guys who are market traders when it comes to dating and courtships. Babaratin ka until you finally give in. For them, they wish to maximize their profits by exerting very little (but safe) efforts to get what they want from you. They are among the many Piso Investors who find texting as the only way to your heart or to your pants (ehem!).

But you know, it's up to you. If you are going to give a good Return on Investment for guys like Texting Tim, then you have to be sure that it is not a boyfriend you're after for. Otherwise, it's best to just let them lose their money.


  1. nice read, joyce. :) i guess men from the past are more real than today, huh? hay... my negativity's here again. :)

  2. Hi Timi! Thanks for reading my blog. Somehow technology has made courtship so convenient that the value becomes lost. Wala na yung paghihirap ng guys ;p